Mike and Michelle Laughlin were our first speakers, and they came to talk to us about worship. They also aimed to encourage a team to emerge from among us to lead worship every day. They asked if anyone could lead worship. No one raised a hand. Then they asked if anyone could play an instrument. Again, no one responded.

 

I felt a deep conviction rising within me, realizing that I wasn't being truthful. This was not what I had expected. It wasn't about not wanting to help lead worship; it brought back old wounds from my past. I recalled when my aunt asked me to play guitar for her, and my mother thought it was the biggest joke ever. I prayed, "Oh Lord, I do not want to deal with rejection, please?" Despite my fears, the conviction pushed me to admit that I could play the guitar—just a little bit. Later, I discovered that one of the other ladies could play the piano. In the end, I only had to lead worship a couple of times, which was such a relief.

 

Another painful challenge at the Ranch was my room-mate. She was much younger than me and believed she had so much of life to teach me. At times this felt like a thorn in my side. She had an issue with my church allowing me to be a home group leader, despite the circumstances of my divorce. According to her, divorce was an unforgivable sin. She confessed that she had a long affair with a married man, yet felt no shame.

 

In 1994, being a white 'South African' marked me as a 'Racist.' It seemed to invoke judgement from certain people. That’s how it felt. One lady made an effort to ensure I was consistently aware of it. This did change near the end of our time together, and we did have some fun at times, but it could’ve been much more. So often we make judgements before getting to know a person.

 

I will tell one of the stories my room-mate and I had. An older German lady arrived at the Ranch at the start. She shared a room with a lovely young Canadian girl. It was clear right from the start that these two did not get on. The young girl was always in tears. Some of us had unspoken thoughts about this German woman. It was almost like she became all weird especially during worship or when we prayed for each other. It was very off-putting. It was almost like she was mocking us. The Ranch focused on sending Christians into church planting. So, they requested details and written references from pastors and employers. They wanted to ensure we were ready for church planting and leadership.

 

During a morning session in class, I felt prompted by the Lord to pray for the visiting speaker, a lady who was ministering and praying for us. So, I moved to the corner of the room. I suddenly felt a sharp, shooting pain. It ran from my head, down my neck, to my shoulders. It came on without warning. I opened my eyes and noticed that the visiting speaker was in front of this German woman. After a couple of seconds, she pulled back her hand, shook her head, and then moved on. Later, I approached her to ask what had happened. She told me that when she stood in front of the woman, she too felt a sharp pain shooting down from her head to her neck. At that moment I realised there was something more sinister going on.

We were also at our first home group evening with a couple who lived not far from the Ranch. Each of us shared a little about ourselves. This same German woman spoke. She told us that she, her mother, and her grandmother had practised satanic witchcraft. But, she had given her heart to the Lord a few years ago. She said she would be returning home the next day.

 

The Director of the School suggested another ministry in America that could help her, but she declined the offer. It was evident that her pastor had been untruthful in the reference he provided.

 

Her roommate, the young Canadian girl, then apologized to the woman. They had argued the previous night. She explained that, when she fell asleep, she dreamt of a woman next to her bed who wanted to kill her. That's why she didn't want to speak to her that morning. The German woman replied that she understood her feelings. Before she fell asleep, she had been so angry that she had thought of killing her.

 

At this point, we were all wide-eyed, and our surprise intensified when we went to bed that night. We stayed in a room that was connected to a Jack and Jill bathroom, which we shared with another couple. When they used the bathroom, they would lock our door to it and unlock it again when done. We would do the same as a matter of course. The door handle was a round knob, and to lock it, you had to turn the knob counter-clockwise. This often sounded like someone was trying to enter our room.

 

This sets the backdrop for what happens next. I went to bed when we got home, but my room-mate was spending a little more time with the younger members of the group. After I turned off the light and went to bed, I was still awake when my roommate finally came in. She undressed and got into bed. A loud CLACK-CLACK sound erupted at the door without warning. I jerked and sat up. My room-mate jumped out of bed. She grabbed an old, flimsy cane chair and shoved it in front of our door. We had no way to lock it. The chair was so flimsy you couldn't even sit on it. But she was determined to protect us from what we feared might be the German woman.

 

Once we realised it was our neighbour locking the Jack and Jill bathroom, we laughed. It was such a relief for all of us when that woman left the next day. In the end, it was good training for all of us. To clarify, her being German had nothing to do with her state of mind. We had another lovely German lady at the Ranch at the same time.