From the very first of the three days we spent with Bob Craine, it became clear what awaited me. I needed to confront the shame and ‘dis-ease’ I was carrying everywhere I went. Family trauma had made me believe lies about myself. Until now, I had acted on those false beliefs.

 

After discussing how we respond to the lies buried deep within our roots, Bob Craine began to minister to us. When he stood in front of me, he fell silent. I remember feeling nervous as he remained quiet for a moment. Sometimes, I felt that men had difficulty praying for me. Then, he spoke up, saying he had never seen anything like it. He described a building of many apartments. Each one was the same—disappointment by men.

I was so tired of this noose around my neck. I doubted my emotionally absent dad had any feelings for me. I felt my mother did not want me, living that lie of rejection. Then the men all followed. I was sexually molested. I was constantly bullied by my brothers. My dad never spoke up and defended me against them. I was raped in my late teens. I had soured relationships with men as I grew up. I suffered humiliation from my first husband's deeds. I was so fed up and tired of feeling this way.

 

The first thing Bob Craine said to me was “The Lord says you must relinquish that guilt. You have no part in it.” He continued to pray for me and others that God would heal and restore us. Altogether it was a good day in class, but I felt raw inside.